Kal Gokani, Mother of Service User:
It’s been a whirlwind of a journey. Every parents dream would be to have a normal pregnancy and have a healthy baby. Unfortunately, some of us are chosen not to. I really do believe that we are chosen for a reason. It’s all about strength and giving a child with special needs the love and care that they need!
Let me tell you about myself, I’m Kal aged 43 Mum of three gorgeous boys!
My first son Rian is 9 now. I didn’t have the best delivery as I found out at 35 weeks I had preeclampsia. Although it seemed like a real whirlwind of a journey with him, we had no idea that our biggest challenge would face us in years to come.
In 2012 I fell pregnant to identical twins! The thought of having twins after preeclampsia put so much pressure on me, of course I was happy, who wouldn’t be with twins? But I just felt I was feeling more and more low. Anxiety kicked in and just the feeling of not wanting to be pregnant. I was living in absolute fear. Some may think I should appreciate being pregnant but it wasn’t not being grateful, it was worry about my health and my son, and all the what ifs. I could die, what would happen?!
Unfortunately, my fears came true when I was diagnosed with preeclampsia at 5 months. I honestly felt my world had come to an end. With a son 2.5 years old, I went straight into hospital. My condition worsened so quickly. I gave birth via c-section at 27 weeks. Unfortunately I couldn’t even make the 28 week mark as my health deteriorated.
I hadn’t seen my boys at all after birth, as of my deteriorating health. They were taken to another hospital for a couple of weeks until a bed was available in Leicester. Both boys were in such challenging positions, the next six months were the worse, however thankfully one of my boys, Sai, came home at six months on oxygen whilst my other son, Taran, unfortunately went from bad to worse!
Taran was under palliative care so he spent a long time in hospital. We were given the option for a tracheostomy to keep him comfortable. However, Taran shocked all of us on this roller-coaster ride. We had the tracheostomy which was helping him and making his lungs work less hard. Don’t get me wrong it wasn’t plain sailing at all and challenges we faced were just so stressful!
Anyway, the plans after being in hospital for 19 months were all set. We were given the choice to go through the Diana Community Children’s Service, however we had to wait for several months before Taran could be discharged. We then explored a number of agencies however none of them really were selling themselves as they didn’t have staff!
We then came across NurtureCare. I was nervous at the thought of having nurses living with our family, it would be a massive change, plus also having a child on oxygen and another who was only 4 at the time.
I met with Angela Stewart (NurtureCare’s Founder) who instantly introduced herself to me and gave me some background details on her agency. However her main aim was to get to know us as a family and what was important to us. I really didn’t know at that point how to react with her as she didn’t give too much away, however Angela was at the same time as listening to me she was actually thinking of our family and how they can support not only with Taran but as a family!
Angela then explained how she could help, giving us profiles of staff and also her most important part to play was family support, so she introduced us to her team of staff and they were just the nicest and most supportive of people. I remember the first day Angela actually worked for us for a period of time before her staff took over. She was so good with the boys!
We then had the wider team of nurses and they would listen and if l was having a bad day, the support they gave was just amazing! The nurses would make notes at every shift and at night they would make sure Taran was safe and warm. They never disturbed us at all so we could rest as much as possible.
After nearly two years Taran was decannulated. It was fantastic news however the hardest part we found was coming home to no nurses. They became a part of our family and the boys loved them so much! I really struggled with that change, even going on appointments I’d have someone with me. They were my right hand and you really appreciate them more when you no longer have them!
I would say if you’re with NurtureCare or planning on choosing an agency, I recommend them highly. There may be ups and downs, like with anything, but the best part is they get resolved!
I hope this article gives you some inspiration and insight into my journey. I can honestly say Miracles do Happen!
Keep NurtureCare close to you and speak with honesty, stay organised and I’m sure the rest will follow…
Angela Stewart, NurtureCare Founder
NurtureCare was established to help many families like Taran’s. It is throughout the country whereby families are nursed in hospitals longer than they need to be. With the right understanding, care and support to these families, we can support them to have some normality within their home with very little disruption to other family members such as siblings.
NurtureCare does not only focus on the child in need, but on the family as a whole.
For myself and NurtureCare, it has been an honour to look after such an amazing family and this as Kal says, is a success and a miracle story. This is the outcome we thrive for each and every family NurtureCare cares for.